Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
Randomize
