Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
Two words: nipple clamps
Randomize
