One of my bosses just told me she's having communication problems because mercury is in retrograde this month. I think she's serious.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
