You took all of my sister's dolls and threw them out the window and then you started talking to her etcha sketch and mr. potato head. I later found you passed out in front of Toy Story and it all made sense.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
WAIT YOU’VE NEVER BEEN TO COSTCO???
COSTCO IS MAGICAL
I can’t believe you two made a group text to scream at me about Costco.
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