I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
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