i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
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