ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
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