i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
listen. just hotwire a car, take off the license plate, make up a new one on a sheet of paper and go the speed limit. i do it like, at least 3x a week.
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
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