Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
Hippo gnu deer
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
I wish the guy in the stall next to me would stop moaning while taking a dump.
I wish you'd stop texting me from the toilet.
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
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