It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
Randomize
