when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
i think my mom watched the whole time
My boss just called me into his office to apologize for being an "inadvertant cockblock"
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
Randomize
