if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
Randomize
