where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
My mom just came into the kitchen and watched me take a double shot of whiskey and chase it with a beer and said "you are my son." Proudest family moment ever
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
Randomize
