Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
Just taxi'd to the airport holding a zip lock bag of my own vomit. Bachelorette success.
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
Randomize
