Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
I wish the iPhone would register texts from 11:59 as "Last Year" instead of "Yesterday."
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
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