Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
Randomize
