Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
I need a hoe opinion
go on
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
Randomize
