Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
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