We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
Randomize
