Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
