youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Randomize