Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
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