Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
Sober January is a disaster.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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