Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
I wish my cat could text because i would tell him that everything will be ok. and i wish he could send them back..but him have no thumbs. him no know what he would text with.
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
One of my bosses just told me she's having communication problems because mercury is in retrograde this month. I think she's serious.
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
You can't just call animal control when you're drunk because there is a bug in the shower.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
Randomize
