I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
Randomize
