It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Randomize