dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Randomize