Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize
