So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
vagina is talking i cant
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Randomize