is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
and she was petting her beer can
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
Instead of texting me to come over, she just sends me a batman symbol.
I don't care if she's a booty call. Marry her.
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
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