Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
Did you pee in the oven last night??
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