THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
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