with your own penis?
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
So apparently the bar gave out free condoms, which I now have a pocket full of. Why is drunk me shoving the fact that I'm single and not getting laid in sober me's face...
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize