i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
Randomize
