yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
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