Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
Redeem this text for a blowjob
yeah well we're currently on the phone and she's telling me about how much she misses me and all this shit and i muted myself and i'm watching porn.
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
Randomize
