Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
Randomize