Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
Bring a bathing suit and your good liver.
My good liver is still at the dry cleaners. Will my backup liver suffice?
Maybe
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
Randomize
