I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
Some dudes just stopped and stared at me peeing in the street for like 5mins, and I yelled HEY. HEY. WANT ME TO SHIT IN YOUR MOUTH? I'LL SHIT ON YOUR CHEST FOR FIVE DOLLARS, PAPI
this is why i love drunk you
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
Randomize
