4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
Pretty sure I asked the person at the pharmacy counter in Walgreens to marry me last night. But also remember Rachel Maddow crawling through the TV screen, so my memory might be a bit compromised...
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
Randomize
