Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
Randomize