She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
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