Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
Ur just texting me random shit. That's what Twitter is for
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
If the people you’re with use the word tequila in a sentence with phrases like hair of the dog or breakfast of champions...run awsy
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