I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
Randomize
