at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
In other news, I woke up still drunk and I think I literally just broke the Guinness book of world records for most bloody Mary's in one day...
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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