when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
Randomize
