But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
I woke up at 5am and he was watching me sleep... Come get meee!!??
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
Randomize