we're blogging at a bar
That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
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