she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
Randomize