Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
My phone now knows what I type and it prompts me with frequently used words. And anytime I use "and" and hit the space key two of the words are "unicorn" and "sausage"
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
Randomize
