i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
Randomize
